I don’t post on Saturdays. But I don’t care. Because I HAD to share.
I was thinking (aka: this usually means journaling in my beloved Moleskine) about the year. And it didn’t go well.
(not the year, the journaling)
Because I was focusing on what didn’t get accomplished. I was making the to-do list for 2013 even more massive than it needed to be. I didn’t even get a fresh start for 2013. Instead I was bringing old baggage–excessive baggage–into a new thing. And it left me feeling overwhelmed, disappointed, and a bunch of other junky feelings.
And suddenly I knew–DUH! THIS IS NOT RIGHT! Basically I did a little self-coaching 101 on myself. (because even coaches aren’t perfect in their thoughts – nope, they sure aren’t – moi included!)
FLIP THE RECORD OVER
When my thoughts are like a broken record, sometimes there’s no sense in trying to fix it–or attempt to move past the skipping/repeating part. WHY? Because if you’re old enough to know about records (like me) you know that usually if there is a skip on a record, there are bound to be more after it. In fact, often there are skips and scratches all over that side. It’s like Murphy’s Law for records.
So I flipped the record over. Basically I force the opposite thought. I play the B-Side.
HOW IT WORKS
So the perfect example was today: my hideous thought process of “what didn’t happen this year that NEEDS to get done next year.”
Now if I’m using the advice of a beloved teacher (B.Katie) then I must ask myself: Is it true? Is it true that what didn’t happen this year MUST happen next year? If I get really honest my answer is typically “no”. Again, this takes gut-wrenching honesty.
Then the next step: play the other side of the record.
See, Side A focused on what didn’t happen…didn’t work…didn’t get done. But then there is Side B. Oh the mystery of Side B! And my Side B has a different question: What did work?
Ohhh. what. DID. work.
Focus on the positive instead of the negative. Gosh what a novel idea.
At first I struggled. It’s a sad fact that we can quickly list the cons, but the pros take a bit more work. More mental muscle. But once I got my mental muscle warmed up to listing pros, the good stuff, the stuff that worked, the stuff that went really well—well, I began to enjoy Side B immensely. The list grew and grew and grew.
And gosh golly if I didn’t get a boat load of stuff accomplished! There are so many things that went well despite it all. (and there was a lot of “all” – - aka: poop)
I publicly offered creativity and art classes to people I didn’t pre-know (scary and amazballs!)
And coached people on doing life, and they wrote me letters of thanks
I formed healthy relationships, took several 24-hours trips, and forgave so much stuff
I moved into a new Studio for teaching and a new home with a right-sized BathTub
I found a way to let go (thank you Karen B, Karen C, Patti D, and Dupee)
I took a “leap of faith” off a 10-story platform (holy cow that was scary!)
I lost a Studio and gained so so so much more (thank You God, thank You)
I cried with joy while watching a “chubby butterfly” dance and fly
I learned a few chords on a guitar, I played piano for others, I sang…
Collaborated with two amazing women to start Heart Restoration Retreats
…and there is more but it gets really personal, private, and sacred.
I did a little happy dance in my office, in my pjs, in my slippers.
I got thankful. Said a prayer. Sang a song. And did another happy dance.
YOUR TURN – YOU AMAZING THING
So before you make those resolutions, or intentions – give yourself what you deserve. A list of the good stuff that happened. What went well. What worked. What you did do without any buts. (no buts, butts, or buttttttttts) If you need reminders, go through your day-planner, start in January and jog that sluggish memory. Go through your Facebook timeline (yes it’s good for something) – find January, click on it, and relive the happy happy great amazing things. They happened–we just forget.
Because you did good stuff, you…
- deserve a round of applause for surviving this year
- for moving past (forgiving) some things, people, circumstances
- pushing through a fear here and there
- for simply keepin’ on keepin’ on
Farwell this year. You were good, bad, ugly–exactly what was meant to be.
And New Year, we got some work and fun ahead! YESSSSSHHHHH!