Right Now I Know…Ver 3.0

heart_on_sleeveIn a world of uncertainty,
there are times it’s good to write down what you know…
what you REALLY know for sure, without a doubt, know.

Oh and that “version 3.0” – well that’s just a big clue to let you know I’ve done this a time or two before at Soiled Wings. It’s always a bit of a naked process, but I also know that when I risk, I serve. When I serve, others identify. When others identify, we realize we are more alike than different.

And that is truth.
Truth is good.
I refuse to wear an air of having it together. Because NO ONE DOES. (that could easily be the first things I write… “no one has it together”)

Here’s what I know right now:

  • There is nothing better than to know you are loved unconditionally.
  • I get fearful when I think about loosing that love–either by ill-fate or my stupid actions.
  • I have too many friends living with or fighting cancer.
  • I believe in things unseen…at least unseen by most.
  • My Creator does not live in a box, and the ways I choose to adore and honor my Creator do not either.
  • …and this gets really messy, because people like predictable boxes.
  • I hate boxes.
  • My cats love them, they will find them and sit in them as if it’s the best invention EVER.
  • Swinging on a swing for 30 minutes is therapy. It worked when I was 5, it works at 45, and 85.
  • I have lost some people in my life, and in hind-sight, it was a gift to me (and probably to them).
  • Breaking free from co-dependant relationships is messy. There is always one more string to cut that I didn’t notice before.
  • My favorite days are when I’m teaching other women, and young woman, to be creative. It charges my batteries.
  • I’m getting really close to being done with hurts from the past. It feels as good as swinging on a swing. No limits. Pure freedom.
  • I’ve mostly stopped caring that I cry. That I have buckets of empathy. I have a tender heart. I was made this way. On purpose.
  • I often want to lie…
  • Sometimes being truthful requires that I just.stop.talking. (stop explaining)
  • Sometimes being truthful requires that I risk.it.all and let something out of the vault.
  • Being truthful has been, and continues to be, the best and hardest things I’ve ever done.
  • In all these ways…truth makes mini miracles of healing occur.
  • I’ve concluded that EVERYONE needs therapy. Or at least someone to really talk to that won’t sugarcoat responses. So let me change that sentence:
  • I KNOW, e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e. needs truth tellers in their life.
  • I have truth tellers. They are brave, courageous, and holy.
  • A holy mess, is a good mess.
  • I hate sugarcoated-Pollyanna stuff. Responses. I’ve lost my tolerance… my grace for that silliness.
  • I’ve tried to stop cursing for Lent, I’ve been fairly good. But above I wanted to say “shit” not “silliness.”
  • Sitting in nature, is not a waste of time. It is honoring. To me. To my Maker. To everyone who benefits from me taking time for solitude.
  • People are the curious spice of life. They make me pay attention, learn, grow, and wonder what their story is.
  • I like how brave, children are. I am trying to be more free like them with other people. Free to ask questions, to interact, to be.
  • Sometimes I just straight up ask people –strangers— their story.
  • I have NEVER been sorry for doing this.
  • I know gay people. I love them. I get upset when others don’t get it.
  • I am ferocious. If I am pushed too far, my fury for the innocent-the underdog-the child-the misunderstood-is almost frightening.
  • I finally started really believing that my prayers are heard. Not because they are answered, but because the Spirit in me delivers every cry of my heart to the Places and Authority who can make rainbows in rainless skies.
  • I believe in holy magic.
  • I don’t use Christianese – I have found it to be very un-authentic in my voice.
  • Magic is a good word.
  • Purpose arrives when you least expect it. Always be ready.
  • I have the bravest clients and students in the world. Because they take risks…and succeed.
  • I still wish some people would forgive me. I never meant to hurt anyone. I was just stupid.
  • I live with boundaries that keep my heart guarded. That keep me in check. That keep me whole.
  • Recently I have felt blessed. It’s hard to accept that. Own it. Because it can all go away so quickly. But I’m really trying hard to rest in it.
  • Never underestimate the power of a hug. Never.
  • Hug longer than expected.
  • Forget the awkwardness.
  • I’m glad I didn’t die when I wanted to.
  • I’m glad to be living, breathing, and being a complete dork.
  • I am happier.

so, what do you know… right now…

signature_2013
Coaching For A Creative WholeHearted Life™

Life Coach: MS, CLC, PCC ~~~ Creativity Coach: KMCC, CCA, Art4Healing®

© 2008-2013 Sherry Meneley All Rights Reserved soiledwings.com sherrymeneley.com soiled wings createheart create heart art journal journaling process art therapy

9 thoughts on “Right Now I Know…Ver 3.0

  1. I love your thought sharing process. You make me think of my life that I so frequently hide away. I’m very proud and blessed to have crossed your path.

  2. One of the things I know for sure is that I look forward to your messages in my inbox. They are good medicine.

  3. As always your posts wow me.
    Wow.
    W.O.W.
    I’m teary-eyed behind the closed doors of my office. Okay, now the tear(s) are trickling down. *snort* Great.

    The only exception: I can no longer swing. Inexplicably I now get sea-sick. 😦 I loved swinging and riding waves. Now I have to watch. pooh.

    (())

  4. I loved reading this and love the way you wrote it. It deeply touched me and I can’t get it off my mind. So many flash backs ran through my mind as I read and one thing I know for sure is you have a tremendous gift to write, to create, to help others. This is something special the Lord has given you and it flows through your heart. It makes you beautiful and sets you apart. Your journey these past few years is proof there are no wasted experiences in life. You are a testament that our experiences, whether they are good or bad, help us grow and create who we are meant to be. Much love to you precious daughter.

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